Sunday 3 November 2013

Dan Savage and his "savage advice"

I happened to catch Dan Savage in Sydney give a talk as part of The Festival of Dangerous Ideas. Entitled "Savage Advice" he discussed the idea that infidelity is not the end of the world in the reality of long-term relationships and referred to his own "monogamish" relationship with his husband and how it can work for some people.

Savage informed us that 40-60% of men and 40-50% of women will cheat on their partners and as we invest so much time into relationships we should not walk away from them because of the occasional slip up. I could not disagree more. If you are going to commit to someone, you commit to someone. You don't commit to them part time. Firstly, creating a cute term like "monogamish" will not lessen the impact of what has occurred and I will not and can not accept "monogamish" into my life. Secondly, you either are monogamous or you're not. Just like you either are vegetarian, sexist or racist or not. No one is vegetarianish or sexistish or racistish.